I thought of more...more awesomely crazy things we all do as moms. Here ya go:
-You voluntarily hold out your hand and let kids spit things into it. ("What's in your mouth? Is that food? Let me see! Spit it out! Spit it out NOW! We don't eat rocks.")
-You get ridiculously excited about things like new shampoo or lotion so you can "pamper" yourself.
-You've justified looking like a train wreck yourself because, "at least the kids look cute." (They may, in fact, be covered in peanut butter and Cheerio dust, but they still are cute.)
-You no longer try on clothes before you buy them, because how in the world are you supposed to do that with one baby attached to you and another performing contortionist moves to get out of the stroller?
-You've actually bought clothes at Wal-Mart (without trying them on) to avoid the above mall scenario.
-You have given up on the above scenarios and do all your shopping online. In the middle of the night.
-You don't eat at fancy restaurants but still feel the need to apologize in advance for the mess your kids will create while at a "family friendly" restaurant. Also, you feel that any eating establishment with CARPET is just asking for it.
-Any and all activities must be scheduled around naptime. If this doesn't happen, you're sure the world will implode.
-You can no longer remember your own birthday thanks to mommy brain, but can still recite "Guess How Much I Love You" and several classic Dr. Seuss books in their entirety from memory.
-You are interrupted no less than 57 times while simply trying to eat a sandwich.
-When you enter a store, everyone is well-groomed and content. When you limp out an hour later, you are a disheveled hot mess, the toddler looks like she's been in a post-apocalyptic battle over crackers (because you thought it would be a good idea to give her a snack) and the baby is screaming like she will end you if you don't get her out of the car seat this second. You also suspect the toddler was leaving a trail of cracker crumbs Hansel-and-Gretel style to find your way back to the car just in case mommy has totally lost it and forgotten where she parked.
-Instead of New York Times bestsellers, you now read mommy blogs from your phone while rocking your baby to sleep.
-The sweetest sounds in the world are gurgly goos from the baby and squeals of delight over something simple like chasing your toddler. And the blissful silence when they are both asleep.
-Every once in a while you have a spectacular moment where you stop and stand in awe of the toddler singing "Twinkle, Twinkle little star" to the baby to stop her crying when you couldn't get to her fast enough. And it's awesomesauce.
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