Raising Warrior Princesses

This is not a post about Xena...or Zena, or however you spell that.  Rather, its about the kind of daughters I hope to raise.

This is something that's been on my mind for a while, but I really got to thinking about it this morning when CBear dressed herself in a frilly sundress and then said, "Hey, Jellybean, let's swordfight!  That's a great idea!" They proceeded to my closet to choose "swords" (hangers...don't ask me why).  Of course, in true girl fashion, it took a while to choose the right color of weapon.  Then they went off to battle each other, and I let them have at it.

This is not the first time something like this has happened.  CBear went through a huge Mulan obsession in the summer and we had to re-enact fighting the Huns about five times a day for a few weeks.  And you know what?  I'm okay with that, because I want to raise a different kind of princess.

I've never been a huge fan of the princess culture surrounding little girls, mostly because what springs to mind when I think of it is spoiled, selfish, entitled girls.  Maybe that's wrong of me and my view is skewed, but living with two little girls who love princesses AND swords has forced me to deal with this issue and I've decided: I want to raise warrior princesses.

My girls love dressing up as princesses.  We have a whole drawer dedicated to princess and fairy costumes, which they complete with my old jewelry.  They dance and twirl in puffy skirts and tutus and want their daddy to tell them they're beautiful.  Glitter shows up all over my house and I have no idea how it got there.  CBear may have asked me on more than one occasion where her prince is because he needs to take her to the ball.  And yet, especially with my her fierce personality, another aspect of princess-hood has manifested.  CBear, with Jellybean following after her, doesn't want to be JUST a princess.  If there is something wrong, she wants to fight to make it right.  I'm good with that.  She has a deep sense of good and evil, and that there is always a battle to be won.  Why do we try to shelter kids from that?  Let's give them a little credit- they figure it out pretty quickly.

Whenever we are reading, watching a tv show or telling a story, CBear always wants to know who the bad guy is.  Stories without a villain aren't worth her time, apparently, because she shushes me and asks for another one.  But if there is a villain to battle, she gets very excited about justice being served and everyone getting to live happily ever after in the end.  And then we usually act it out, per her request.

So, clearly I'm not one of those moms who bans toy swords/guns and wrestling with each other on the floor (its a normal occurrence around here...how much worse are boys, again?  I could be in for it if we have any sons in the future).  And I'm not one bit concerned they're going to end up as sociopaths.  I'm certainly not going to freak out if they bite a pop-tart in the shape of a gun or try to shoot each other with bubble ammo (have you seen or read about these types of things happening?  Ridiculous.)

So, as far as princesses go around here: I'm trying to instill that yes, they can be beautiful with sparkly, twirly dresses.  But they are also kind, generous, brave, and willing to fight for what is right.  At least, I hope the message is sticking.  Now, you'll have to excuse me while I go find my cardboard scimitar and spying scope...